I See You

I see you, momma. I see all the work you do. Your endless effort and tiresome days. Your constant worries, doubts, and judgments you feel from others and from society.  I see you getting up early in the morning, instantly exhausted. Never feeling rested enough. Giving every single thing you have to little ones. To your job, to your partner, to your home. Even if you're not working outside the home, the tasks at hand are constant. Endless. Exhausting. Sometimes you feel like you're drowning. Or maybe you almost always feel that way and this isn't something that's rare.  You can barely keep your eyes open but you continue to put one foot in front of the other. Somehow... some way.

Meals and chores and work... coffee... SO much coffee. And maybe wine? Maybe coffee by day, wine by night is your mantra these days.  Sometimes it feels like someone is constantly raining on your parade.  Children yelling and fighting... messes and fingerprints. School and driving and drop offs.  Interrupted conversations and non existent showers. Cold dinners and unwashed hair.  Smudged makeup from the day before (or even more, I'm not judging).  I see that you can't put that baby down because she'll cry. I see that you have to multitask and hold the baby while you vacuum or while you do anything in a day.

They tell you to enjoy every single second even though that is impossible.  They tell you that time flies and to cherish it but it is SO hard when you're in the thick of it. All of the conflicting advise you read and are constantly bombarded with. Am I doing this right? Will they be ok? Are the kids going to remember only the bad days and not the fun we had or how much I tried? Will they get sick because I let them eat cookies for breakfast today? Will they be unproductive in society because I let them have too much screen time? Will they be bullies at school because I shout too much or because I refuse to spank them? Will they have food allergies because the advice I was given isn't the advice they give now?

Things are constantly changing. Every season of life has hard parts.  Some days we truly rock at life and other days, we want to run away from it all. One daunting task after another.

Are you ok?  How are you feeling?  How are the kids?

Do you want me to answer that honestly? HA!

Does any of this sound like you?  

If it does, I see you. I see all the effort you make. I know your heart is in the right place. I know that you want the best for your little (or big) kids.  I know that you want to do things the "right" way and sometimes you just have to survive. Maybe you yell too much or don't meet your own expectations.  

Maybe you're not meant to be perfect. And by maybe, I mean I know that for certain. You aren't supposed to get it "right" every single time. We all fail at things. We all fall a little short. We all have our struggles but we have our strengths, too. Focus on your strengths. Maybe you're not the best at sitting down with your kids and doing the pretend play thing BUT, you're really awesome at planning and executing crafts or doing a bake day with your kids! Maybe you're not the best at keeping your house spotless but you're really great at taking the kids out for an impromptu picnic at the park! Or, on the flip side, maybe you ARE great at keeping things tidy and organized and no longer want to be shamed for it. You no longer want to be made feel like you don't spend time with your kids simply because you prioritize tidying up.

What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses? Maybe you can spend today reflecting on that and remembering that we weren't created to be perfect all the time.  Maybe we can just spend today giving ourselves some grace. Maybe we can spend today loving ourselves and loving each other. 

I see you. I see you in real time. I see your strengths and I'm proud of you. Your kids will see your imperfections and realize that it is OK to not be perfect and it is expected.

I see you. You're doing GREAT!